sappy stories from the bible

[Round]

Originally Posted by Dr. Rubicite

I will take you up on your challenge, Round, but first you have to prove to me that you're a real Christian. After all, you could be some faker out to sully their good names by acting retarded. The evidence I will accept:

Originally Posted by Mark 16:17-18
And these signs shall follow them that believe; In my name they shall cast out devils; they shall speak with new tongues; They shall take up serpents; and if they drink any deadly thing, it shall not hurt them; they shall lay hands on the sick, and they shall recover


So, if you could just set up your webcam, get a mug and some Dran-O, we'll get this party started...

I don't twist the Word. Plus if my goal was not heaven, I wouldn't spend so much time and effort into reading and studying the bible. If my goal was to lead people astray, my goodness... I should start getting used to the heat!

By the way, here are some signs you can look up...Sign's that Jesus said would come during the end times. We can see them now because of our technology but they were always there. These are considered signs of the heavens

Whirlpool galaxy. Cross centered.


Notheren Cross.


Cydonia - City in mars. Resembles Cairo.

[Strifen]

One of the most brilliant quotes ever...

"The idea that God is an oversized white male with a flowing beard, who sits in the sky and tallies the fall of every sparrow is ludicrous. But if by 'God' one means the set of physical laws that govern the universe, then clearly there is such a God. This God is emotionally unsatisfying ... it does not make much sense to pray to the law of gravity." - Carl Sagan

[Zuuljin]

I fail to see the northern cross....

All I see are a:

Kite, Arrow, Pentagram, pacman, and a swastika.

[Alcestis]

Originally Posted by Round

Whirlpool galaxy. Cross centered.

Now I fucking believe.

[Korioni]

One of my favorite scripture passages...

"Listen to his words. He is possessed of certainty. He holds to a secure vision of the world, a man with the correct answers - that the prerequisite questions were themselves the correct ones goes without saying. A citizen with certainty, Yathvanar, can be swayed, turned, can be made into a most diligent ally. All one needs to do is find what threatens them the most. Ignite their fear, burn to cinders the foundations of their certainty, then offer an equally certain alternative way of thinking, of seeing the world. They will reach across, no matter how wide the gulf, and grasp and hold on to you with all their strength. No, the certain are not our enemies. Presently misguided, as in the case of the man below, but always most vulnerable to fear. Take away the comfort of their convictions, then coax them with seemingly cogent and reasonable convictions of our own making. Their eventual embrace is assured."

"I see."

"Our greatest enemies are those who are without certainty. The ones with questions, the ones who regard our tidy answers with unquenchable scepticism. Those questions assail us, undermine us. They... agitate. Understand, these dangerous citizens understand that nothing is simple; their stance is the very opposite of naivety. They are humbled by the ambivalence to which they are witness, and they defy our simple, comforting assertions of clarity, of a black and white world. When you wish to deliver the gravest insult to such a citizen, call them naive. You will leave them incensed; indeed, virtually speechless... until you watch their minds back-tracking, revealed by a cascade of expressions, as they ask themselves: who is it that would call me naive? Well, comes the answer, clearly a person possessing certainty, with all the arrogance and pretension that position entails; a confidence, then, that permits the offhand judgment, the derisive dismissal uttered from a most lofty height. And from all this, into your victim's eyes will come the light of recognition - in you he faces his enemy, his truest enemy. And he will know fear. Indeed, terror."

"You invite the question, then..."

"Do I possess certainty? Or am I in fact plagued by questions, doubts, do I flounder in the wild currents of complexity? I hold to but one certainty. Power shapes the face of the world. In itself, it is neither benign nor malicious, it is simply the tool by which its wielder reshapes all that is around him or herself, reshapes it to suit his or her own... comforts. Of course, to express power is to enact tyranny, which can be most subtle and soft, or cruel and hard. Implicit in power - political, familial, as you like - is the threat of coercion. Against all who choose to resist. And know this: if coercion is available, it will be used. ... Listen to that man. He does my work for me. Down in the dungeons, his cellmates hear his ravings, and some among them join in chorus - the guards take note of who, and that is a list of names I peruse daily, for they are the ones I can win over. The ones who say nothing, or turn away, now that is the list of those who must die."

"So, we let him scream"

"Yes. The irony is, he truly is naive, although not of course as you originally meant. It is his very certainty that reveals his blithe ignorance. It is a further irony that both extremes of the political spectrum reveal a convergence of the means and methods and indeed the very attitudes of the believers - their ferocity against naysayers, the blood they willingly spill for their cause, defending their version of reality. The hatred they reveal for those who voice doubts. Scepticism disguises contempt, after all, and to be held in contempt by one who holds to nothing is to feel the deepest, most cutting wound. And so we who hold to certainty, Yathvanar, soon find it our mission to root out and annihilate the questioners. And my, the pleasure we derive from that..."

[Chips]

Couple decent quotes I found.

President George Washington - "The government of the United States is not, in any sense, founded on the Christian religion." (Treaty Of Tripoli, 1796)

President Thomas Jefferson - "Religions are all alike – founded upon fables and mythologies."

President Thomas Jefferson - "I do not find in orthodox Christianity one redeeming feature."

President Thomas Jefferson - "Christianity is the most perverted system that ever shone on man."

Abraham Lincoln - "The Bible is not my book nor Christianity my profession."

President James Madison - "In no instance have . . . the churches been guardians of the liberties of the people. Religious bondage shackles and debilitates the mind and unfits it for every noble enterprise."

President William Howard Taft - "I do not believe in the divinity of Christ and there are many other of the postulates of the orthodox creed to which I cannot subscribe."

Aristotle - "Men create gods after their own image, not only with regard to their form but with regard to their mode of life."

Thomas Edison - American inventor: "Religion is all bunk. I have never seen the slightest scientific proof of the religious ideas of heaven and hell, of future life for individuals, or of a personal God."

Albert Einstein - "I do not believe in a personal God and I have never denied this but have expressed it clearly."

Benjamin Franklin - "I have found Christian dogma unintelligible."

Sigmund Freud - "Religion is comparable to a childhood neurosis."

Ernest Hemingway - "All thinking men are atheists."

Mark Twain - "I cannot see how a man of any large degree of humorous perception can ever be religious -- unless he purposely shut the eyes of his mind & keep them shut by force."

Napoleon Bonaparte - "Religion is excellent stuff for keeping common people quiet."

Magellan - "The church says the earth is flat, but I know that it is round, for I have seen the shadow on the moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the church."

Jesse Ventura - wrestler/governor: "Organized religion is a sham and a crutch for weak-minded people who need strength in numbers."

[Cynno]

Originally Posted by Chips

Couple decent quotes I found.

President George Washington - "The government of the United States is not, in any sense, founded on the Christian religion." (Treaty Of Tripoli, 1796)

President Thomas Jefferson - "Religions are all alike – founded upon fables and mythologies."

President Thomas Jefferson - "I do not find in orthodox Christianity one redeeming feature."

President Thomas Jefferson - "Christianity is the most perverted system that ever shone on man."

Abraham Lincoln - "The Bible is not my book nor Christianity my profession."

President James Madison - "In no instance have . . . the churches been guardians of the liberties of the people. Religious bondage shackles and debilitates the mind and unfits it for every noble enterprise."

President William Howard Taft - "I do not believe in the divinity of Christ and there are many other of the postulates of the orthodox creed to which I cannot subscribe."

Aristotle - "Men create gods after their own image, not only with regard to their form but with regard to their mode of life."

Thomas Edison - American inventor: "Religion is all bunk. I have never seen the slightest scientific proof of the religious ideas of heaven and hell, of future life for individuals, or of a personal God."

Albert Einstein - "I do not believe in a personal God and I have never denied this but have expressed it clearly."

Benjamin Franklin - "I have found Christian dogma unintelligible."

Sigmund Freud - "Religion is comparable to a childhood neurosis."

Ernest Hemingway - "All thinking men are atheists."

Mark Twain - "I cannot see how a man of any large degree of humorous perception can ever be religious -- unless he purposely shut the eyes of his mind & keep them shut by force."

Napoleon Bonaparte - "Religion is excellent stuff for keeping common people quiet."

Magellan - "The church says the earth is flat, but I know that it is round, for I have seen the shadow on the moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the church."

Jesse Ventura - wrestler/governor: "Organized religion is a sham and a crutch for weak-minded people who need strength in numbers."

Fucking $$$$$

Love this shit.

[Dirus]

Originally Posted by Round

Whirlpool galaxy. Cross centered.


Notheren Cross.


Cydonia - City in mars. Resembles Cairo.

Seriously...

I cant comprehend how this can be convincing to ANYONE

[Round]

Originally Posted by Dirus

Seriously...

I cant comprehend how this can be convincing to ANYONE

It's meant for those who live by faith.

Originally Posted by Carl Sagan

The idea that God is an oversized white male with a flowing beard, who sits in the sky and tallies the fall of every sparrow is ludicrous. But if by 'God' one means the set of physical laws that govern the universe, then clearly there is such a God. This God is emotionally unsatisfying ... it does not make much sense to pray to the law of gravity."

God, is definitely not emotionally challenged. If someone who spoke the existence of all the known laws of the world, chemistry in our body, and cycle of life. How can we say that this person is emotionally unsatisfied? This person is obviously the most self sufficient thing in and out of existence. I dont think someone of this power would create humans to cry like a baby later on. Theres obviously something missing, because someone of this power is obviously greater than our thinking. God is beyond our thoughts, so who are we to say how he feels. lol we never met the guy. All he wants, is the same thing every human on the face of the earth craves... A family. This is why he made the angels, and why he made us after them. Angels failed his perfect family ( he knew this, free will is everywhere ), then he created humans after. God wants people to love him at there own will, to be his saints.

Like any parent in a family. They'd feel jealous if their child prefers their neighbors instead of them. What's so hard to understand from this?

In short. If God is God. Infinite. How can we, who are limited, determine the emotions and concepts of a God, when we fall infinitely short of his level? hundreds and thousands of years of knowledge =/= infinite. So if God is infinite. We can't say much. Because we don't know lol! How can we know? This is the question every human wants to know, and I don't blame them. I'm just like one of you guys who has questions. But I live by faith. I'm a believer, that's all.

[cosmic_cs]

Me too. I'm posting on the May religion thread.

[Dirus]

Originally Posted by Round

It's meant for those who live by faith.

Ok, but do you realize that you can look up and see anything you want to see. Even looking at those three images, you can see thousands of different things.

[Eomer]

I was going to post in here, but then I realized I already masturbated this morning.

[chthonic-anemos]

Originally Posted by Alcestis

Now I fucking believe.

holy shit

[GrobbeeTrull2.0]

Originally Posted by Chips

Couple decent quotes I found.

President George Washington - "The government of the United States is not, in any sense, founded on the Christian religion." (Treaty Of Tripoli, 1796)

President Thomas Jefferson - "Religions are all alike – founded upon fables and mythologies."

President Thomas Jefferson - "I do not find in orthodox Christianity one redeeming feature."

President Thomas Jefferson - "Christianity is the most perverted system that ever shone on man."

Abraham Lincoln - "The Bible is not my book nor Christianity my profession."

President James Madison - "In no instance have . . . the churches been guardians of the liberties of the people. Religious bondage shackles and debilitates the mind and unfits it for every noble enterprise."

President William Howard Taft - "I do not believe in the divinity of Christ and there are many other of the postulates of the orthodox creed to which I cannot subscribe."

Aristotle - "Men create gods after their own image, not only with regard to their form but with regard to their mode of life."

Thomas Edison - American inventor: "Religion is all bunk. I have never seen the slightest scientific proof of the religious ideas of heaven and hell, of future life for individuals, or of a personal God."

Albert Einstein - "I do not believe in a personal God and I have never denied this but have expressed it clearly."

Benjamin Franklin - "I have found Christian dogma unintelligible."

Sigmund Freud - "Religion is comparable to a childhood neurosis."

Ernest Hemingway - "All thinking men are atheists."

Mark Twain - "I cannot see how a man of any large degree of humorous perception can ever be religious -- unless he purposely shut the eyes of his mind & keep them shut by force."

Napoleon Bonaparte - "Religion is excellent stuff for keeping common people quiet."

Magellan - "The church says the earth is flat, but I know that it is round, for I have seen the shadow on the moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the church."

Jesse Ventura - wrestler/governor: "Organized religion is a sham and a crutch for weak-minded people who need strength in numbers."

You have this giant list of people and then you put Jesse Ventura in there? Really?

[The Ancient]

Dude, he doensn't have time to bleed!

I haven't really read the whole thread, have we gotten to the part where people start arguing whether aethism is a belief that god doesn't exist or a lack of belief.

That part is always good for a laugh. "I can't be bothered to read religious text or a dictionary!"


PS. Chips, half the people on your list held belief in a God, but not Christianity.