The Girls Who Broke Your Heart Thread

[Eomer]

Fuck it, I am trying that shit on plentyoffish.com right now.

[Eomer]

rofl, first reply in under 5 minutes. This shit is gold Jerry, gold!

Originally Posted by me

After a rigorous perusal of your profile, I wanted to let you know I've already married and divorced you in my mind. Thanks for all the wonderful imaginary memories, you will always have a special place in my heart.

Sincerely, your ex-hubby.

PS: I am going to need half of your money according to our pre-nup .

Originally Posted by her

I don't ever remember signing a prenump....but if youre gonna play like that..Ill just take you to court. Becasue Im pretty sure the word slipped out that you slept with my best friend while we were together...so there for you get nothing!!!soo we will see who gets what!!

Originally Posted by me

If memory serves, I had you sign the pre-nup while you were semi-comatose staring at the giant rock I slipped on your finger. If you got it appraised after the divorce, whoever told you it was cubic zirconia is a damn liar I say!

As far as the best friend goes, I have a sneaking suspicion I was drugged and tricked in to it by you to get out of the pre-nup.

It's a good thing you blinded me with cuteness, otherwise I may have seen your deviousness earlier.

I really have no idea what I'm doing here, but we'll see.

[Tarrant220]

Alright well I'm home from work, time to try this I guess. I'm prepped for many rejections.

[Tyen]

Picking up chicks over the internet is not good plan~

[Tarrant220]

Originally Posted by Tyen

Picking up chicks over the internet is not good plan~

Meh, I work a lot, don't like Bar flies and honestly, thats the difference between this and anything else?

People say "Don't pick up chicks in clubs.....or bars....or the internet.....or in malls....."

where the hell else are you supposed to?

Whatever works for someone they should roll with it. -shrugs-

[Tarrant220]

Well I be gosh damned.....the shit worked. Well on a limited basis, but worked it did none the less.

After a rigorously brief overview of your profile I wanted to let you know I have already married and divorced you in my mind.

Thanks for all the wonderful imaginary memories... you will always have a special place in my heart.

Your ex-hubby,

~Phil

PS I am going to need half your money according to our prenup

----------------------

Dear Ex-Hubby,

I will be sending, as you requested (according to our prenup), half of my money.

The -$31,816.55 will be sent to you in the form of various bills, including those from MY school loans, credit cards that were in both our names, credit cards that I had in my name without you knowing, and several other various little things like my car note, and the balance of the personal line of credit you took out to buy me the engagement ring (which I have since pawned and taken the cash to buy airline tickets to Mexico where I will be staying at an all inclusive resort for the next 7 days).

I enjoyed what we had, and am still disheartened that it didn't work out in the end for us. I will never forget the three days in Wisconsin. Those were the best days of my life.

You're always in my heart,

Nikie

PS - I sold the dog for a Gucci purse.

-----------------------

All I read there was our dear dog Buster is gone, we had many great imaginary times with him, how could you simply sell him for a purse?! The poor thing deserved a much better fate then that, I shall mourn him for many many minutes this I promise you.

As for all the rest, it's a good thing after everything was final I hit the lottery for all those millions or else I could of been royally screwed. That resort you're going to, yeah, I own it now. I'll be seeing you on the beach my dear, perhaps we can discuss a few things more in detail.

Champagne Wishes and Caviar Dreams,

~Phil

-----------------------------------

As much fun as having an imaginary post relationship relationship with you has been, I have to get back to my cleaning! Fam is coming over tomorrow, and I'm doing all the cooking so I'm just freaking out a little bit - its my first holiday meal that I've done on my own!!

But thanks for the smiles tonight. Perhaps we could continue with real conversation?

Nikie

PS- I would never sell buster for a purse. You know I love that dog. I just said it to make you upset. I'm sorry.

---------------------

Glad I could put a smile on your face!

I wish you a very Happy Thanksgiving and best of luck with your meal. I'm sure it'll turn out great!!

And yes, I look forward to continuing a conversation with you when you get the time. =)

~Phil

So yeah not bad I guess, not used to this kinda thing but I guess I did something right somewhere in there. Another girl, one I suspected was way out of my league responded laughing her ass off saying that was the best message she's ever got and that was it, I couldn't spark a response out of her after that.

I'll take the one success thus far and run with it, it's the most promising thing I've had in awhile. lol

[larseny316]

Update: Tossed a few messages back and forth with one of the chicks today, who I know is way out of my league, way way out. In a bar/wherever wouldn't even have bothered saying hello. But apparently she dug the intro enough to strike up a conversation where I found out she plays wow, and reads the same book series I do, which led to an actual conversation, which included her number.

So, knock the bullshitness of it all, but bottomline is I had fuckall planned for today anyway, and I ended up with the # of a girl who i consider a ten. Sucks I exped slightly slower in wow because I had to alt tab, but meh, fair trade. I don't give a shit if its the net, currently I spend 60 hours a week at work, at a school, where out of the 2000 female students, if I piss off 1 of them hitting on them, I lose my job. Doesn't leave much free time for socializing.

And yes I know, someone is going to say go ahead and hit on the chicks etc in a bar even if they are out of your league, but I usually crash and burn at that.

[Tyen]

I don't know what to say to whatever is going on in here.

[Ronne]

Originally Posted by Dumar

if you have to put on peacock feathers and dance around screaming, what does that tell yourself about yourself?

That you've consumed Jager in the last 1-4 hours?

[Yutnopash]

Originally Posted by Tyen

I don't know what to say to whatever is going on in here.

Up has become down, babies are crying in the streets, all that we knew to be true has now been proven false...

Or, picking up chicks on the interwebs isn't difficult...at all especially with an opening that is funny and could prompt further somewhat in-depth responses. It's the finding the not so psycho ones or the ones that really are ok and not the ones that seem ok but then are revealed to be cum-guzzling super whores that traverse whole oceans in a single bound to fuck fat neckbearded supertards that's the hard part.

[aychamo_aycono]

Originally Posted by larseny316

Update: Tossed a few messages back and forth with one of the chicks today, who I know is way out of my league, way way out. In a bar/wherever wouldn't even have bothered saying hello. But apparently she dug the intro enough to strike up a conversation where I found out she plays wow, and reads the same book series I do, which led to an actual conversation, which included her number.

So, knock the bullshitness of it all, but bottomline is I had fuckall planned for today anyway, and I ended up with the # of a girl who i consider a ten. Sucks I exped slightly slower in wow because I had to alt tab, but meh, fair trade. I don't give a shit if its the net, currently I spend 60 hours a week at work, at a school, where out of the 2000 female students, if I piss off 1 of them hitting on them, I lose my job. Doesn't leave much free time for socializing.

And yes I know, someone is going to say go ahead and hit on the chicks etc in a bar even if they are out of your league, but I usually crash and burn at that.

just give me an e-blowjob and its all even

[aychamo_aycono]

yikes, i crashed and burned my first five sets. after that i wa son fire. lots of social proof dancing with attractive colleagues. one gilr i didnt recognize i taught how to scuba dive. made out with her a bit on the dance floor - oops. love iT! ending up making out a lot too itwh this girl who had a stalker patonic friend, who kept stlakiner her hsit, an i keep get her to sneak off to makeout and he stlake us lOL hello world

[Tyen]

Originally Posted by aychamo_aycono

yikes, i crashed and burned my first five sets. after that i wa son fire. lots of social proof dancing with attractive colleagues. one gilr i didnt recognize i taught how to scuba dive. made out with her a bit on the dance floor - oops. love iT! ending up making out a lot too itwh this girl who had a stalker patonic friend, who kept stlakiner her hsit, an i keep get her to sneak off to makeout and he stlake us lOL hello world

Spanish, I don't speak it.

[kollos]

Originally Posted by Tyen

I don't know what to say to whatever is going on in here.

me neither. but i like it.

[aychamo_aycono]

Originally Posted by Tyen

Spanish, I don't speak it.

oh god, when i just re-read that i was dreading what i must have said. i wokeup on my couch today and i have no idea how i got home

thank god i dont have a baby