Belt or Fly

[Fogel]

don't use the fly, it was invented by women anyway. no dude would put dozens of interlocking metal teeth near his johnson

[Blank]

Originally Posted by Fogel

don't use the fly, it was invented by women anyway. no dude would put dozens of interlocking metal teeth near his johnson

QFT.

[TheOkapi]

I use the fly, on both boxers and jeans, don't unbutton. My cock fears no teeth. Not since my girlfriend, anyways. If you can't control your wang, and keep it away from zipper teeth. You all need more practice with your unit.

[dak]

Don't actually pull the pants down but undo belt/button and unzip fly. Junk goes through left side of boxer legging and is secured in position by my sack.

Usually I just go in the shower though, right into the drain. Pissing under warm water just feels right.

[Occido]

When wearing shorts I just aim out the leg hole and piss. Takes practice, but I have it down to an art now.

[Lejina Bloodbath]

Unzip fly and pull over the elastic. I used to go through the window, but there isn't one with military underwears (I used to dislike them for that, but after a bite from an adventurous ant, I learned to appreciate their sealy tightness).

[Blumpster]

If I'm wearing a belt I just use the zipper, and pull apart the flap and whip her out. I wear boxer briefs most of the time, just started recently and had to get used to using the damn things after wearing buttonless boxers for ease of pissing for years. I like the brief type boxers, and my girlfriend says I look sexy in them...also, my boners look absolutely huge when inside the things. It blew my mind.

[findar]

time to hijack this thread with awesome

[EnigmaticParadigm]

Step 1: I place a firm, yet purposeful grasp on my pork-sword. This is also referred to as the "shoop phase."

Step 2: With the noticeable relaxing of the urethral sphincter, I position myself approximately six to seven feet from the toilet basin; feet squarely placed slightly further apart than shoulder distance - pupils constricted. This is known as the "da woop phase."

Step 3: Endorphins rush to my pelvic girdle as I aim my micturation-monster in an arcing position towards the ceramic vortex. My mouth opens as wide as possible; the transmandibular joint tearing, eys forming a pseudo-strabismus convergence. A linguistic reflex eminates from deep within my diaphram as I let loose with a bellowing "IMA CHARNGIN MAH BLADDER!"

Step 8: Curiously, steps 4 through 7 continuously evade me as I wake up in my driveway - witness to the macabre...
Three dead domesticated animals, two midgets, and a peregrine falcon lay eviscerated at my feet. The mixture of their blood and tears still slowly rolling off the age-worn lines of my mighty chin, I take note down the street at the smoking wreckage of an ice cream truck and a empty police cruiser; occupants whereabouts unknown...

Step 9: Flush the toilet.

[decairn]

Zippers? No thanks - buttons all the way. Go buy Levi 501s.

[Kreugen]

Ever since the accident, I have to piss facing backwards.

[PigBenis]

Originally Posted by EnigmaticParadigm

Step 1: I place a firm, yet purposeful grasp on my pork-sword. This is also referred to as the "shoop phase."

Step 2: With the noticeable relaxing of the urethral sphincter, I position myself approximately six to seven feet from the toilet basin; feet squarely placed slightly further apart than shoulder distance - pupils constricted. This is known as the "da woop phase."

Step 3: Endorphins rush to my pelvic girdle as I aim my micturation-monster in an arcing position towards the ceramic vortex. My mouth opens as wide as possible; the transmandibular joint tearing, eys forming a pseudo-strabismus convergence. A linguistic reflex eminates from deep within my diaphram as I let loose with a bellowing "IMA CHARNGIN MAH BLADDER!"

Step 8: Curiously, steps 4 through 7 continuously evade me as I wake up in my driveway - witness to the macabre...
Three dead domesticated animals, two midgets, and a peregrine falcon lay eviscerated at my feet. The mixture of their blood and tears still slowly rolling off the age-worn lines of my mighty chin, I take note down the street at the smoking wreckage of an ice cream truck and a empty police cruiser; occupants whereabouts unknown...

Step 9: Flush the toilet.

/thread

[Vatoreus]

Originally Posted by EnigmaticParadigm

Step 1: I place a firm, yet purposeful grasp on my pork-sword. This is also referred to as the "shoop phase."

Step 2: With the noticeable relaxing of the urethral sphincter, I position myself approximately six to seven feet from the toilet basin; feet squarely placed slightly further apart than shoulder distance - pupils constricted. This is known as the "da woop phase."

Step 3: Endorphins rush to my pelvic girdle as I aim my micturation-monster in an arcing position towards the ceramic vortex. My mouth opens as wide as possible; the transmandibular joint tearing, eys forming a pseudo-strabismus convergence. A linguistic reflex eminates from deep within my diaphram as I let loose with a bellowing "IMA CHARNGIN MAH BLADDER!"

Step 8: Curiously, steps 4 through 7 continuously evade me as I wake up in my driveway - witness to the macabre...
Three dead domesticated animals, two midgets, and a peregrine falcon lay eviscerated at my feet. The mixture of their blood and tears still slowly rolling off the age-worn lines of my mighty chin, I take note down the street at the smoking wreckage of an ice cream truck and a empty police cruiser; occupants whereabouts unknown...

Step 9: Flush the toilet.

Oh. My. God. I'm in pain right now.

[Criminiminal]

When I can, I prefer to have my scantily clad bitches crouch over the toilet and slowly make out with each other while undoing my belt, followed by my button and zipper, after the monster has been unleashed, one slowly licks the side of my shaft while the other suckles the balls, after a few minutes of this action, my rod is at the optimal length for a hose-like flow.

The sheep are then brought in and stacked in a pyramid fashion, I have found that 3-4 sheep stacked this way gives several advantages over standing on solid ground. Such as a soft, warm platform for my feet, a higher elevation for the proper arch into the bowl and, of course, the obvious one, the subtle baaa's really help calm the bladder as well as the urethra to allow for a overall ultimate urinating experience.

[brekk]

EnigmaticParadigm > Criminiminal

That is all.