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Old 05-12-2008, 10:23 AM   #1 (permalink)
column
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Hookers and Halo?
13 Year Old Steals Dad's Credit Card to Buy Hookers

WTF

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Asked why he ordered two escorts, Ralph said he thought it was the thing to do when you win a "World of Warcraft" tournament. They told the suspicious working girls they were people of restricted growth working with a traveling circus, and as State law does not allow those with disabilities to be discriminated against they had no right to refuse them.

The $1,000 a night girls sensing something up played "Halo" on the Xbox with the kids, instead of selling their sexual services.

Ralph's ambition is to one day become a politician.
.
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Originally Posted by kegkilla on Superman
WHY THE FUCK DIDN"T JOR-EL MAKE THE KRYPTON SPACESHIP BIG ENOUGH FOR THE WHOLE FAMILY?!?!?! FUCK SUPERMAN WHAT A BULLSHIT STORY!!! REDO IT FOR THE NEW MOVIE!!!

HOW THE FUCK DID KRYPTON BLOWING UP MAKE ROCK INTO KRYPTONITE?!?!? WTF IS THAT BULLSHIT?!?!?!?! URANIUM MAKES MORE SENSE IN 2008 LAWL!!
Last edited by column : 05-12-2008 at 10:27 AM.
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Old 05-12-2008, 10:27 AM   #2 (permalink)
The Ancient
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Maybe Dad should have spent more time at home. Good for Jr.
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I hear that to celebrate the 20th anniversary of R.C. Pro Am nintendo is making a dancing game / farming simulator hybrid.
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Old 05-12-2008, 10:30 AM   #3 (permalink)
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fuckin A kid
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Old 05-12-2008, 10:58 AM   #4 (permalink)
Big W Powah!
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A+. I would hire the living fuck out of that kid as a salesman!
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Old 05-12-2008, 11:13 AM   #5 (permalink)
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That kid knows how to fuckin' party.

I can't even imagine what would've happened to me if I did that at 13..
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Old 05-12-2008, 11:14 AM   #6 (permalink)
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That kid knows how to fuckin' party.

I can't even imagine what would've happened to me if I did that at 13..
I'd have been like "holy crap! I uh...." *feels bad and gives it back to his dad*
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Old 05-12-2008, 11:21 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Holy shit...what a back story. These kids are on top of the things..
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Old 05-12-2008, 11:24 AM   #8 (permalink)
The Dauntless One
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HAY GUYZ LETS GET HOOKERS WHEN WE SCORE BIG POINTS IN WOW!

They must've hired some bitchin hookers yet they didn't fuck them... I wish I was (and could) afford $1000 hookers. On a side note, I'm guessing his father is loaded so I don't feel bad for him.
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Old 05-12-2008, 11:30 AM   #9 (permalink)
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This kid is awesome. :O
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"TAKE THE FUCKING PICTURE OF JIGGLYPUFF NOW. NO YOU FUCK, YOU FUCKED UP. DON'T THROW A FUCKING APPLE AT HIM."
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Old 05-12-2008, 12:00 PM   #10 (permalink)
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The escort girls who were released without charge, told the arresting officers something was up when the kids said they would rather play Xbox than get down to business.
Probably gay. If I had two whores in a motel room when I was 13, I wouldn't have been playing Halo, that's for fucking sure.
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Old 05-12-2008, 12:04 PM   #11 (permalink)
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not every kid is having sex at 13.
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Best raiding game ? Wow.
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Old 05-12-2008, 12:17 PM   #12 (permalink)
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A sex scandal at 13 would ruin his political career, an Xbox scandal on the other hand won't have much weight.
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Old 05-12-2008, 12:36 PM   #13 (permalink)
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not every kid is having sex at 13.
Not every kid has access to two professionals. There are hornier creatures than a 13y old male but only if you count 14-16y old males.
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Old 05-12-2008, 02:17 PM   #14 (permalink)
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not every kid is having sex at 13.
I never said I was banging chicks at 13. However, considering I was rubbing em out by like 9, I would have been more than ready to take care of business.
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Old 05-12-2008, 03:10 PM   #15 (permalink)
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moral of the story: once you play wow, you lose your sex drive and can only get it up with halo. at any age.

that kid is still a hero
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