The 'I'm stupid thread'

[Ginn]

When I was 12 I made a dry-ice bomb out of a 2litre bottle. I didn't blow up after like 1 minute so I went and picked it up... I still have all my fingers but I'll never get feeling back in half my hand.

[Ether]

You must be able to give yourself a great stranger.

[Gudrid]

I resubscribed for TBC.

[Aetos]

Originally Posted by Kindnugs

I once thought that the phrase "blacker the berry sweeter the juice" was true cause I thought it was like dark meat on a turkey. As the dark meat has more flavor.

Happened last week in a hotel: I got up in the middle of the night and started to take a leak in the toilet. I moved around cause my piss wasn't landing in the water. No matter what way I moved I couldnt get it to hit the water.... I stopped pissing and turned the light back on... yeah the seat was down. What fun cleaning up a mess of piss at 3am.

Did they not employ Housekeepers at this hotel?

[Himeo]

When I was 12 I turned down a BJ from a future porn star. Nobody offered to touch my dick for four years, =/.

She cursed me!

[Drajakur]

Originally Posted by Gudrid

I resubscribed for TBC.

I got you beat easy.

I lined up in the snow for an hour to get TBC; and then in a fit of insanity I bought one of those Brady Game Guides (which was totally fucking useless); then I came home, spent all night trying to install and patch the fucking client; spent one day playing through Hellfire Peninsula along with 400+ other tards; and then quit WoW.

Now I'm playing again and there is no one to group with; all my gear sucks; and I regret not being 70.

What a fucking chump I am.

[Ronne]

Keep getting drunk and sleeping with women I know but have no intention of ever having any kind of relationship with because they are annoying as fuck. Then I feel bad about it and have to deal with dramas for like a week.

[Blumpster]

I ate at Ruby Tuesdays. About 24 hrs later, while passed out drunk, I woke up and puked my guts while simultaneously shitting my pants with nasty food poisoning diarrhea. The combined effects of a hang over, excruciating back pain from sleeping on a couch, and food poisoning made for possibly the worst day of my life.

[Ginn]

Originally Posted by Ether

You must be able to give yourself a great stranger.

Well I'm right handed and it was my left hand, so the coordination is still off, but I'm getter better at it since I don't have to put my hand to sleep any longer.

[Al Capwn]

Probably the dumbest thing I ever did.....wow, embarassing. Long, funny (at least to me), and true..

In Key West, where I went to highschool, it was Fantasy Fest week. My friends and I were trying to get some ecstasy downtown, but we couldn't find anything that looked reliable. Well, one guy and his gf invite us to some party in a hotel, but it was invite only, so the guy says to drop his name and we'll get in.. Cool right? We thought so, we were like 16 and shit like that never happened to us.

Well, we get to the hotel after smoking a couple of blunts, all set to do some E and roll with some chicks.. So, we tell the security guy, "Hey we're here for the party" and tell him the guys name and he says GTFO, and that we were lying. So we go around the corner and decide to wait till the security guard isnt looking and we'll just go in teh side door and go up that way. Well we do, but the fucking door is locked. The guard sees us and starts yelling into his radio so we run and jump the nearest fence into someone's backyard.

This backyard had to have had a party earlier or something because there were empty beer bottles and shit everywhere.. We go to jump another fence to get to the street, but before we do, I see a FULL bottle of Old English whiskey (i think it was the OE whiskey).. I grab it and as I'm going over the fence, my jeans get caught on the top of the fence, tear, and I start falling.

I'm not sure how I thought to do it, but instinctively, mid-flight, I switched the bottle to my other arm (the one not about to make impact with concrete) so it wouldn't get broken. To make a longer story a bit shorter, I broke my wrist..but not the bottle of whiskey. It wasnt that bad of a break because I didnt go to the doctor till the next day... I was too drunk and stoned to really care that night.

[Aegdaien]

Originally Posted by Ginn

When I was 12 I made a dry-ice bomb out of a 2litre bottle. I didn't blow up after like 1 minute so I went and picked it up... I still have all my fingers but I'll never get feeling back in half my hand.

My brother and I did that too when I was about the same age. We couldn't get the damn thing to blow up so we started chucking a hammer at it. Needless to say when it blew the entire fucking neighborhood heard it. My mom thought someone got shot. Was pretty fucking fun though - melted the bottle and everything. I guess it was pretty dangerous in retrospect. Eh.

[Nark]

I was sleeping with this girl using condoms for a couple months. We had an agreement to not sleep with anyone else. We decided to not use condoms(she was on the pill.) We broke up on bad terms. I got all freaked out about std's. Got tested , negative. Got tested later that year, negative.

What was the stupid part of it? 1) Banging a chick without a condom .... 3 months of being nervous about stds does NOT EQUAL the 30 minutes of pleasure from not wearing a condom. 2) Freaking myself out so bad about hiv and stds it was ridiculas, i have been a hypochondriac ever since then and sometimes it's not even about sexual health. Long term stress and nervousness will fuck you up a lot longer than you think , it really fucks with the wiring of your brain =/.

[Ginn]

This is more of a drunk story, but when I was 16 we were heading back to my friends house, me and this chick drank half a 1.75L of Tequila. We're wasted I don't even know where I was, we pulled over at a gas station while we were sitting there I guess a cop was asking me my name, and I thought for some reason that my friends were asking me what I was going to tell the cops if we got pulled over. I honestly had no idea the car was even stopped. So I tell them my name is Chris Flores... and my friends are like "NO isn't your name Chris (insert Real last name here) and I say, "Yeah but that's not what I'm gonna tell the cops." While the cop was standing right there asking me my name. Anyways he opens the door I puke on his shoe.

Before the cop comes and checks us out, we were parked at the gas station parking lot cause someone had to use the bathroom, the girl who was drinking tequila with me, gets out of the geo tracker, face plants RIGHT on top of the 1.75L of tequila and shatters the bottle Huge baseball size knot on her forehead, so after I've puked on this cops shoe, he asked me what me and the girl were arguing about... appearantly my "friends" told the cops they picked us up on the side of the road (since we were the only drunk ones it made sense right?), we were fighting and they gave us a ride. So the cop was asking me about the knot on her head. Good thing I was too drunk to know who he was talking about. I found out the next day what happened for reals.

[Burkex]

I recently did something really stupid that I am still regretting. A few years ago, around Sept 2004 I bought 100 shares of Google stock for around $135 a share and then a few months ago in August 2007 I sold it all for $530 a share because I thought it was at its peak and there was no way it was going to continue to go up. Then in September I watched it go up and up every day until 3 months later in November it was up to around $710 per share. Basically I lost around $18,000. Fucking idiot. The other idiot thing that I did was I should have bought way more than 100 shares in 2004.


Another HUGE idiot thing I did in my life was spend so much time playing MMO's. What a fucking waste of time.


Lord of the Idiots:

[Stroker Ace]

On New Years Eve 2000 I made out with a girl I KNEW had Mono a week before. I was drunk as fuck and was doing cocaine, so I said fuck it. I had strep throat and mono for 2 weeks.