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02-26-2006, 03:46 PM
| #1 (permalink) |
| Banned  Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 1,017
| Reasons why Chuck Norris is awesome When Chuck Norris talks, everybody listens. And dies. When taking the SAT, write "Chuck Norris" for every answer. You will score over 8000. On his birthday, Chuck Norris randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun. Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one. Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won. Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress. Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door. Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice. There is no chin behind Chuck Norris beard. There is only another fist. When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isnt lifting himself up, hes pushing the Earth down.  |
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02-26-2006, 03:48 PM
| #2 (permalink) |
| Is Kermit gunna have to make a bitch go "GLARRRRGH?!"  Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Pre World War III America
Posts: 2,482
+54 Internets | I refuse to be the first person for flaming you that this is 893457983743 years old due to the fact that I (for whatever reason) actually like the Chuck Norris quotes. Carry on.
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02-26-2006, 03:53 PM
| #5 (permalink) |
| "Hamburgers, the cornerstone of any nutritious breakfast" Join Date: Mar 2002
Posts: 792
+6 Internets | We expect better from an '03 Poor Show
__________________ Well now everything dies baby that's a fact But maybe everything that dies someday comes back Well I got a job and tried to put my money away But I got debts that no honest man can pay |
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02-26-2006, 04:02 PM
| #8 (permalink) | |
| Registered User Join Date: Jul 2002
Posts: 177
| Quote:
No, these and the similar Vin Diesel lists are near carbon-copies of Bill Brasky jokes that started on Saturday Night Live.
__________________ Lothaine! | |
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02-26-2006, 04:02 PM
| #9 (permalink) |
| Registered User  Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: The Wild Blue Yonder
Posts: 262
+1 Internets  | What really made me lol was him reading those on The Best Damn Sports Show "It was great guys, and I'm counting the days until I come back... and I've counted to infinite twice."
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02-26-2006, 04:13 PM
| #12 (permalink) | |
| Enough wicked gay on this board as it is.  Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: France
Posts: 4,153
| Quote:
__________________ Give me negative internets you cock sucking nobodies. RIP Spiderman-Troupe 2002-2008 | |
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02-26-2006, 05:07 PM
| #14 (permalink) | |
| I think I'm drunk enough to drive you home. Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: What is, is.
Posts: 2,458
| Quote:
not a direct link (well sometimes) since it goes to a random video. But, you can find it on the list on the left, under Chuck 'Damn' Norris. | |
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02-26-2006, 05:33 PM
| #15 (permalink) | |
| Banned  Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Georgia
Posts: 281
| Quote:
I knew he was aware of him, due to him addressing the facts on his website, but I wasn't aware of this. I'm reminded of a scene in Lone Wolf McQuade where, after battle fatigue, he doesn't pour water on himself but lathers his skin with BEER; then he proceeds to unearth his car from underground and whip ass. | |
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