Sex before marriage?

[Eomer]

Originally Posted by Vatoreus

You are seriously on anachronistic bastard, you know that? Everything was better 10-50 years ago in your eyes...

If pressed, he will also tell you that he is the "least biased person on the boards" so don't you forget it!

[Dumar]

Originally Posted by Azrayne

I only approve of heterosexual sex in the missionary position with the lights out for the sole purpose of recreation.

see this is what i mean. society has taught you backwards. you should want to have sex with your wife because you feel emotionally bonded with her, and that sexual act would be an extension of that. the only way it's 'bad' is if the emotional bond is bad. when it comes to sex and marriage, you don't think of doggy-style fucking and bjs. that's what culture has taught you, and the definition of marriage is not compatible with current culture, so we change it to what suits us.

that doesn't mean it's correct.

[Astrocreep]

Originally Posted by Azrayne

Well personally, if I'm going to be having sex with the same woman the rest of my life, I'd like to know that it's at least going to be enjoyable. Sex is one of the basic human pleasures in life, and there's no way I'm dooming myself to a future of shitty sex because I married someone who thinks missionary position is the be all end all of bedroom fun.

ok thats fine but it doesnt sound like you are in love with that female, sounds like you just want a steady fuck partner. thats cool but thats not a marriage. thats precisely why marriages dont last any longer. people always unhappy with their fucking.

[Kuriin]

Originally Posted by Suineg

Commitment is about 'sexual compatibility'?

Wow that's news to me.

Oh, God, shut the fuck up already.

[Screamfeeder]

Originally Posted by Dumar

if you pick and choose bits and pieces, it kinda loses its meaning. you got people respecting the bond of marriage between two people, but those same two people doesn't respect the bond on which it was founded to begin with? it really doesn't make sense.

What a load of bullshit. You realize that marriage as an institution goes back to before we could even write shit down on papaya leaves right? Certain cultures throughout the ages have used marriage from stuff ranging to population control, social networking, political maneuvering and millions of other reasons.

There is no global set of rules that define it and lay it out as, "This is The Way it Must Be". If you take the Christian worldview of marriage you are still just picking and choosing which parts you want. You might totally disagree with how the Aztecs, Hopi or Sumatrans handled marriage.

Don't come in here with your "culture has dictated we must have sex before marriage" bullshit as if it means anything because people have been doing that since we were back in caves. There is NO set definition of it. If you attempt to lay one out, you are just picking the one that makes sense to you.

Originally Posted by Dumar

see this is what i mean. society has taught you backwards. you should want to have sex with your wife because you feel emotionally bonded with her, and that sexual act would be an extension of that.

No that is just you taking your worldview and imposing it on other under the guise of "society"

Originally Posted by Dumar

when it comes to sex and marriage, you don't think of doggy-style fucking and bjs. that's what culture has taught you, and the definition of marriage is not compatible with current culture, so we change it to what suits us.

YOU might not think doggy-style and BJ's go hand in hand with marriage, but that does not make it so. That is just you picking and choosing your worldview and placing it on everyone else.

[Dumar]

Originally Posted by Screamfeeder

What a load of bullshit. You realize that marriage as an institution goes back to before we could even write shit down on papaya leaves right? Certain cultures throughout the ages have used marriage from stuff ranging to population control, social networking, political maneuvering and millions of other reasons.

There is no global set of rules that define it and lay it out as, "This is The Way it Must Be". If you take the Christian worldview of marriage you are still just picking and choosing which parts you want. You might totally disagree with how the Aztecs, Hopi or Sumatrans handled marriage.

Don't come in here with your "culture has dictated we must have sex before marriage" bullshit as if it means anything because people have been doing that since we were back in caves. There is NO set definition of it. If you attempt to lay one out, you are just picking the one that makes sense to you.

of course different cultures define marriage differently. i wasn't saying otherwise. i was saying the way our culture defines marriage, historically and contemporarily.

if you want to have an aztec marriage, knock yourself out.

[Azrayne]

Originally Posted by Astrocreep

ok thats fine but it doesnt sound like you are in love with that female, sounds like you just want a steady fuck partner. thats cool but thats not a marriage. thats precisely why marriages dont last any longer. people always unhappy with their fucking.

In the end, the whole point of marriage and love and romance and all that is for a penis to enter a vagina and impregnate the woman so she can have babies and ensure the continuation of the species. I'm just saying that if you're going to commit yourself to one individual for the rest of your life, you should enjoy it, a happy sex life is a huge factor in a satisfying relationship.

A relationship isn't built on romantic love alone, it's a complex and multifaceted construction, but a huge part of it is sexual. When you boil it down, we marry someone so we can have sex with them and make babies, and sex is both a major part of our lives and our psychology and one of the foremost of our basic pleasures. How you can see it as anything other than integral to a healthy relationship is beyond me.

[Soygen]

Waiting to get married was awesome before EA ruined it!

[Sharmai]

As with all things just because something was one way in the past does not mean it need continue the same way in the future. And for that matter if we are going to stick to the sex of the past then were are my 700 wives, hot sister i am allowed to fuck according to the bible, and slaves who suck my cock? Fuck society advanced past that...

There is a difference between sex and lovemaking. You should make love with your wife and know you will because you love her but that doesn't replace the primal need to fuck for pleasure. Of course you can pretend to ignore that primal animal desire because your wife fucks like a dead fish while I found someone who fucks and makes love equally well before I married her.

[Voyce]

Originally Posted by Dumar

then you're picking and choosing what you want that's convenient with your worldview and beliefs. i mean, i can celebrate the 4th of july next month as gaining independence from the xenu, but that really doesn't make sense, but it works for me.

Or maybe we just recognize that said religious bullshit was used to make the idea sustainable because the wrath of god/natural disaster is a lot more intimidating than one actually having enough insight to know a committed monogamous relationship should have some formalized recognition, the act solidifying a change upheld by societal laws-and a presentation of one's dedication to maintain one's faithfulness to another. Not that it really worked for any of the involved parties, except maybe guys.

You know I'm more on the agnostic side of things than the purely atheist, and want to believe that things can have a reason that falls outside the purely mechanical. I want to believe that just .1% of the time, you might actually have a 100% valid opinion, I mean I think once I almost agreed with you on an opinion (I know *shudder*). Of course I'm probably wrong and your just around for the sake of survival instinct and not otherwise.

But really you will always choose the impractical out of the principal of a "pure" representation as opposed to more obvious logic. If we lived in a universe with binary responses, probability dictates you'd have to be right about half the time. I figure whatever universe we live in, your perception must become reality at least ONCE if we explore it far enough--but then again that's a linear argument for moral justification, as if one response was actually more valid than the next you know?

Damn, it is fascinating sometimes to reflect upon some of the FoH forum's characters over the years.

[kedwyn]

Yes. People should also live together as well for at least a year before being married. I'm also a Christian not all of us subscribe to the draconian view point.

[Screamfeeder]

Originally Posted by Dumar

if you want to have an aztec marriage, knock yourself out.

Ok then why did you claim it was picking and choosing when Tenks brought up the atheistic/agnostic worldview of marriage? It makes just as much sense as any other kind of worldview and has nothing to do with what you may or may not perceive marriage as being.

See, what it seems like your doing is saying that people who have a non-traditional view of marriage(as you define traditional), are accepted not because their beliefs make sense or are correct, but because our culture has shaped them that way. That is a load of bullshit and you know it.

[Dumar]

Originally Posted by Voyce

stuffs

this has nothing to do with logic whatsoever. this is so far removed from logic that it's like throwing a math book at a leaky sink. i'm not taking any minority position for its sake because i could care less. i'm just telling the truth.

what this is is taking our traditional idea of marriage and changing it to what suits us. if you don't like a certain something, then you change it to fit your worldview, to make it consistent with your life. this makes you feel good and better about it. it's not right or wrong in a moral sense; it just is.

but it is incorrect.

[Dumar]

Originally Posted by Screamfeeder

Ok then why did you claim it was picking and choosing when Tenks brought up the atheistic/agnostic worldview of marriage? It makes just as much sense as any other kind of worldview and has nothing to do with what you may or may not perceive marriage as being.

See, what it seems like your doing is saying that people who have a non-traditional view of marriage(as you define traditional), are accepted not because their beliefs make sense or are correct, but because our culture has shaped them that way. That is a load of bullshit and you know it.

well alright, if you create your own voodoo sect and write up your institution of marriage, i won't argue.

usually when people say 'marriage' though, like on this forum, they have a certain idea in mind.

[Kuriin]

Originally Posted by Dumar

this has nothing to do with logic whatsoever. this is so far removed from logic that it's like throwing a math book at a leaky sink. i'm not taking any minority position for its sake because i could care less. i'm just telling the truth.

what this is is taking our traditional idea of marriage and changing it to what suits us. if you don't like a certain something, then you change it to fit your worldview, to make it consistent with your life. this makes you feel good and better about it. it's not right or wrong in a moral sense; it just is.

but it is incorrect.

You're about as annoying and wrong as Suineg. Wait, I think you might've surpassed him on that one.