How stupid tamed turkeys are

Camerous · 08-29-2007, 02:58 PM

I was thinking about animals yesterday while I was posting in the Michael Vick thread and remembered something that happened to me when I was a kid. Pretty amusing to me so I figured I would share it and maybe give a few of you a chuckle.

About 20 years ago I went out to stay with my grandparents on their farm for the summer. They usually only raised pigs, goats, and chickens for eating and selling but this summer was a little different. My grand father decided he was gonna get some turkeys to raise for Thanksgiving. So we built a pin for them out of an old chicken coop my grandfather had behind the barn. We set it up like you would for chickens and all that. My grandfather went to the coop-op and got 50 turkeys. We put them in the pin and watched them for a little bit. They would eat the food we had put in there for them but they never would drink. We sat and watched them for a good hour and still none of them would drink. I got bored, I was 10 at the time, so I ran off to play and my grandfather stood there a little longer before he too went off to do some chores.

We came back a few hours later and still none of the water was gone from the trough. A couple of the turkeys had their tongues hanging out and were just kinda wobbling around, still eating the feed I might add. My grandfather got concerned so he called the county extension office and talked to the County Agent. Come to find out turkeys are so dumb you have to TEACH them to drink water. The way you do that is to put bright colored marbles in the trough at the bottom of the water. Turkeys will peck at the marbles and get water in their mouth when they do. They will then swallow the water. *shakes head* So my grand father took and got some marbles and put them in the bottom of the trough then lead some of the turkeys over to the trough and sure enough in about 10 mins all of the turkeys had drunk and were looking a lot better. We just shook our heads at how dumb an animal can be.

About a month later we all went fishing. It had been a super hot day so some huge thunderstorms had formed and were heading our way. My grandfather made us get in the car and wait out the storm. It was a gully washer of a storm. It rained for about 30 mins so hard you couldn't even see out the windows. After the rain slacked up we went home to find ALL of the turkeys dead. My grandfather searched and searched for what had gotten in the coop and killed them but there as no blood any where. He started fearing that maybe they had got some disease that had killed them and might affect his chickens so he called the County agent again and he came over. He looked the turkeys over and asked us if we had put the turkeys in the barn when it rained earlier. We said no and he shook his head. he took one of the turkeys and cut open it's chest. It's lungs were full of water! It had drowned on dry land! The agent then told us that turkeys are so dumb that when it rains if you don't put them up they will keep looking up into the sky until enough water runs down their noses and mouths to drown them.

Needless to say my grandfather never tried raising turkeys again. And that's how stupid tame turkeys are hehe

Flood950 · 08-29-2007, 03:02 PM

I aint no zoologist, but that sounds like they may be the dumbest creatures ever. You would think even after this many years of being bred just for slaughter, that they would still at least remember how to ...you know..stay alive!

I have never heard of this type of behavior before..I wonder if other tamed animals are like this..huh.

Awanka · 08-29-2007, 03:02 PM

I've heard that tamed turkeys are dumb as bricks, but wild turkeys are actually fairly savvy critters.

Flood950 · 08-29-2007, 03:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Awanka

I've heard that tamed turkeys are dumb as bricks, but wild turkeys are actually fairly savvy critters.

Last year there were a few of them that invaded the property where I work. There is a golf course connected with a lot of woods so its not surprising. Anywho... they were causing havoc in the parking lots. They would chill out in between peoples cars and go nuts when people came close to them. They made a horrible, loud noise.

I thought it was pretty damn funny, I get here early and just parked away from where they go...but the entertainment at the end of the day watching people try to get in their cars.

Eventually animal control had to come though, I guess they can actually be pretty dangerous...I wouldnt want one of those going after my face...they are big!

Awanka · 08-29-2007, 03:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Flood950

Last year there were a few of them that invaded the property where I work. There is a golf course connected with a lot of woods so its not surprising. Anywho... they were causing havoc in the parking lots. They would chill out in between peoples cars and go nuts when people came close to them. They made a horrible, loud noise.

I thought it was pretty damn funny, I get here early and just parked away from where they go...but the entertainment at the end of the day watching people try to get in their cars.

Eventually animal control had to come though, I guess they can actually be pretty dangerous...I wouldnt want one of those going after my face...they are big!

Fuck no. And imagine how embarassing it would be coming into work with scratches all over and explaining how you got your ass kicked by a turkey.

Camerous · 08-29-2007, 03:27 PM

Talking about birds attacking people, my grandfather tried raising some geese one time. Those bastards would lower their heads and run up and fucking bite the piss out of you. They didn't have teeth really but they would pinch blood blisters on you if they got a good hold on you. I had one attack me when I was playing with my GI Joes out in a dirt patch. I was using fire crackers to simulate bombs when I felt something latch a hold of the side of my neck. The damn goose had sneaked up behind me and when I bent over to put another firecracker in the ground the damn thing attacked me. My grandmother came running when she heard me screaming and she had to take a stick and beat the damn thing off of me. I had a huge blood blister on the side of my neck for almost a month after that. Finally my grandfather got rid of them cause they were too much trouble to have with kids around.

Hell migth as well tell this story too hehe

My grandfather had some cows a long time ago. He had 8 heifers and 1 mean ass bull. He kept them in this huge pasture and in the middle of the pasture was a pond that the kids in the neighborhood liked to swim in but they couldn't go to it without my grandfather cause the bull hated everyone else.

It was a hot August day and my mother was only around 12 when my dad came over to play at her house with some of the other local kids. They all went down to the fence and saw the bull way off on the other side of the pasture. My dad got into the pasture and went towards the pond. He got lal the way to the pond and so the other kids followed him. They had been swimming and playing for about an hour when the bull finally saw them. he charged across the pasture towards them. My mother screamed when she saw the bull coming so the other kids started running. My dad saw that they would never out run the bull so he jumped into a tree next to the pond and helped all the other children up into it's branches. The bull would butt the tree trying to shake the kids off. Eventually it got tired and wondered off a little piece but every time a kid would start to get down it would charge back over. They stayed in that tree for 6 hours before my grand parents finally came hunting them hehe

Flood950 · 08-29-2007, 03:29 PM

"I was using fire crackers to simulate bombs"

Thats some good supervision you had going on there!!!

Funny story though, cant go wrong with a good animal attack tale

Camerous · 08-29-2007, 03:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Flood950

"I was using fire crackers to simulate bombs"

Thats some good supervision you had going on there!!!

Funny story though, cant go wrong with a good animal attack tale

lol hell man as long as you didn't kill anyone you could do whatever you wanted. I got shot in the head one time with a BB gun when we were playing cowboys and indians.. with BB guns. I had to go get the BB cut out of my head hehe

Believe · 08-29-2007, 04:23 PM

Hm, I thought that was fairly common knowledge about Turkeys (the drowning in the rain thing), guess not.

Cybsled · 08-29-2007, 04:29 PM

GI Joes and Firecrackers are like peanutbutter and chocolate.

I remember one time we got tired of an old toy jeep and some GI Joes we thought "sucked", so we put them into the jeep and put a m-80 in the backseat. BOOM. Nothing but little shards of plastic everywhere. What was even better was like 30seconds after it blew up, some piece of the jeep fell from the sky ;p

The Dauntless One · 08-29-2007, 04:45 PM

Reading this thread made me think of this:

Dzul · 08-29-2007, 04:53 PM

pelownd

Schatze · 09-01-2007, 12:36 PM

Wild turkeys are fucking stupid too. They did an experiment to determine the minimum physical requirements of a female turkey for a male to try to mate. First, they were using dead female turkeys. That tells you something right there.

Second, they were able to remove everything until they had a head on a post and the male turkey would still try to nail the head on a pike. Finally, they started paring away the head. They got it almost down to nothing before the turkeys would stop mistaking them for viable mates.

In conclusion, turkeys are either fucking retarded, or they're of Japanese descent.

schwein · 09-01-2007, 12:54 PM

you have to teach chickens how to drink too.

i had a white rooster that use to jump on white milk jugs and hump them. then the main rooster would chase him away and try to hump the jug too.

Frawdo · 09-01-2007, 06:15 PM

I bet it would have been a different story if that Pelican had tried to eat a cat.

Camerous, I suppose it's good that you're proud of your upbringing, but really now more than ever, I can't picture you as anything but the stereotypical bible belt farm raised Bush supporting republican country boy.

08-29-2007, 02:58 PM	#1 (permalink)
Camerous Registered User Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Overthere next to that place Posts: 2,216 -34 Internets	How stupid tamed turkeys are I was thinking about animals yesterday while I was posting in the Michael Vick thread and remembered something that happened to me when I was a kid. Pretty amusing to me so I figured I would share it and maybe give a few of you a chuckle. About 20 years ago I went out to stay with my grandparents on their farm for the summer. They usually only raised pigs, goats, and chickens for eating and selling but this summer was a little different. My grand father decided he was gonna get some turkeys to raise for Thanksgiving. So we built a pin for them out of an old chicken coop my grandfather had behind the barn. We set it up like you would for chickens and all that. My grandfather went to the coop-op and got 50 turkeys. We put them in the pin and watched them for a little bit. They would eat the food we had put in there for them but they never would drink. We sat and watched them for a good hour and still none of them would drink. I got bored, I was 10 at the time, so I ran off to play and my grandfather stood there a little longer before he too went off to do some chores. We came back a few hours later and still none of the water was gone from the trough. A couple of the turkeys had their tongues hanging out and were just kinda wobbling around, still eating the feed I might add. My grandfather got concerned so he called the county extension office and talked to the County Agent. Come to find out turkeys are so dumb you have to TEACH them to drink water. The way you do that is to put bright colored marbles in the trough at the bottom of the water. Turkeys will peck at the marbles and get water in their mouth when they do. They will then swallow the water. shakes head So my grand father took and got some marbles and put them in the bottom of the trough then lead some of the turkeys over to the trough and sure enough in about 10 mins all of the turkeys had drunk and were looking a lot better. We just shook our heads at how dumb an animal can be. About a month later we all went fishing. It had been a super hot day so some huge thunderstorms had formed and were heading our way. My grandfather made us get in the car and wait out the storm. It was a gully washer of a storm. It rained for about 30 mins so hard you couldn't even see out the windows. After the rain slacked up we went home to find ALL of the turkeys dead. My grandfather searched and searched for what had gotten in the coop and killed them but there as no blood any where. He started fearing that maybe they had got some disease that had killed them and might affect his chickens so he called the County agent again and he came over. He looked the turkeys over and asked us if we had put the turkeys in the barn when it rained earlier. We said no and he shook his head. he took one of the turkeys and cut open it's chest. It's lungs were full of water! It had drowned on dry land! The agent then told us that turkeys are so dumb that when it rains if you don't put them up they will keep looking up into the sky until enough water runs down their noses and mouths to drown them. Needless to say my grandfather never tried raising turkeys again. And that's how stupid tame turkeys are hehe __________________ Camerous' Magelo

08-29-2007, 03:27 PM	#6 (permalink)
Camerous Registered User Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Overthere next to that place Posts: 2,216 -34 Internets	Talking about birds attacking people, my grandfather tried raising some geese one time. Those bastards would lower their heads and run up and fucking bite the piss out of you. They didn't have teeth really but they would pinch blood blisters on you if they got a good hold on you. I had one attack me when I was playing with my GI Joes out in a dirt patch. I was using fire crackers to simulate bombs when I felt something latch a hold of the side of my neck. The damn goose had sneaked up behind me and when I bent over to put another firecracker in the ground the damn thing attacked me. My grandmother came running when she heard me screaming and she had to take a stick and beat the damn thing off of me. I had a huge blood blister on the side of my neck for almost a month after that. Finally my grandfather got rid of them cause they were too much trouble to have with kids around. Hell migth as well tell this story too hehe My grandfather had some cows a long time ago. He had 8 heifers and 1 mean ass bull. He kept them in this huge pasture and in the middle of the pasture was a pond that the kids in the neighborhood liked to swim in but they couldn't go to it without my grandfather cause the bull hated everyone else. It was a hot August day and my mother was only around 12 when my dad came over to play at her house with some of the other local kids. They all went down to the fence and saw the bull way off on the other side of the pasture. My dad got into the pasture and went towards the pond. He got lal the way to the pond and so the other kids followed him. They had been swimming and playing for about an hour when the bull finally saw them. he charged across the pasture towards them. My mother screamed when she saw the bull coming so the other kids started running. My dad saw that they would never out run the bull so he jumped into a tree next to the pond and helped all the other children up into it's branches. The bull would butt the tree trying to shake the kids off. Eventually it got tired and wondered off a little piece but every time a kid would start to get down it would charge back over. They stayed in that tree for 6 hours before my grand parents finally came hunting them hehe __________________ Camerous' Magelo Last edited by Camerous : 08-29-2007 at 03:35 PM.

08-29-2007, 04:29 PM	#10 (permalink)
Cybsled Registered User Join Date: Feb 2002 Posts: 9,417 +14 Internets	GI Joes and Firecrackers are like peanutbutter and chocolate. I remember one time we got tired of an old toy jeep and some GI Joes we thought "sucked", so we put them into the jeep and put a m-80 in the backseat. BOOM. Nothing but little shards of plastic everywhere. What was even better was like 30seconds after it blew up, some piece of the jeep fell from the sky ;p __________________ Training the citizens of Norrath from 1999-2003!

09-01-2007, 06:15 PM	#15 (permalink)
Frawdo Death By Sexy Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Canada Posts: 1,679 +2 Internets	I bet it would have been a different story if that Pelican had tried to eat a cat. Camerous, I suppose it's good that you're proud of your upbringing, but really now more than ever, I can't picture you as anything but the stereotypical bible belt farm raised Bush supporting republican country boy. __________________ It's okay. She can jump really high

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08-29-2007, 03:02 PM	#2 (permalink)
Flood950 Registered User Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Boston Posts: 345	I aint no zoologist, but that sounds like they may be the dumbest creatures ever. You would think even after this many years of being bred just for slaughter, that they would still at least remember how to ...you know..stay alive! I have never heard of this type of behavior before..I wonder if other tamed animals are like this..huh.

08-29-2007, 03:29 PM	#7 (permalink)
Flood950 Registered User Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Boston Posts: 345	"I was using fire crackers to simulate bombs" Thats some good supervision you had going on there!!! Funny story though, cant go wrong with a good animal attack tale

08-29-2007, 04:23 PM	#9 (permalink)
Believe Whiskey Tango Foxtrot Join Date: Aug 2006 Posts: 2,108 -5 Internets	Hm, I thought that was fairly common knowledge about Turkeys (the drowning in the rain thing), guess not.

08-29-2007, 04:45 PM	#11 (permalink)
The Dauntless One Flaccid Steel Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Vancouver Posts: 1,471 -11 Internets	Reading this thread made me think of this:

08-29-2007, 04:53 PM	#12 (permalink)
Dzul hay guyz look teh 16th chapel Join Date: Aug 2004 Posts: 369 -3 Internets	pelownd

09-01-2007, 12:36 PM	#13 (permalink)
Schatze Registered User Join Date: May 2002 Posts: 1,504 +0 Internets	Wild turkeys are fucking stupid too. They did an experiment to determine the minimum physical requirements of a female turkey for a male to try to mate. First, they were using dead female turkeys. That tells you something right there. Second, they were able to remove everything until they had a head on a post and the male turkey would still try to nail the head on a pike. Finally, they started paring away the head. They got it almost down to nothing before the turkeys would stop mistaking them for viable mates. In conclusion, turkeys are either fucking retarded, or they're of Japanese descent.

09-01-2007, 12:54 PM	#14 (permalink)
schwein straight out of cobden Join Date: Jan 2004 Posts: 178 -3 Internets	you have to teach chickens how to drink too. i had a white rooster that use to jump on white milk jugs and hump them. then the main rooster would chase him away and try to hump the jug too.