[Shogon]

I've thought about this kind of stuff numerous times... as have probably most people. This post might ramble a little bit, so if you don't feel like reading it, then don't, and don't bother responding.

Oh, and please feel free to correct me on anything expressed here that is wrong. I'm no theologist nor is my knowledge on the bible extensive in the slightest, so try not to take offense.

At this point in my life, I have no idea what I believe. I would like to believe in God, but you can't force yourself to believe something, can you? That's why it's called believing. You either do, or you don't.

Obviously, there is no concrete undisputable proof of God, and it all boils down to faith.

I have a few questions, that nobody can really answer, but are interesting (at least to me) to think about.

If God is all knowing, why are we here? God knows whether or not you're(we as individuals) going to end up in hell or heaven before you're created, so what's really the point? Does that make any sense at all? This is one of, if not the biggest problems I have with believing. If you can think logically even the slightest, you will see that this makes no sense.

However, taking into the account that there is an actual possibility of God existing... an infallible, all powerful, all knowing being's reasoning and actions would obviously not be known to us unless it was deemed by God that we know and understand God's reasoning. And it would obviously be absurd for any of us to believe that we could rationalize and think on the same level of God and that we are anywhere even remotely close to being as intelligent.

That's the only possible halfassed explination I can think of for any of this existence. Well, that and the possibility that if God does exist, God is not all knowing, which contradicts everything we've heard and leads to no answer either.

Obviously these do not satisfy me in the least.

If believing is the only way to heaven, what happens to people that have never heard anything of God? This is something that could be perhaps be answered by any of you that have studied religion or grown up around it as what is told by religion, but myself, I have not, so I don't know. Again, you can't give a factual answer but you can tell me what the religions tell us to have faith in regarding this, however.

I must admit that the thought of there being no God is extremely frightening and can lead to anxiety (for me at least). Just dying and that's it? No more anything for you. Obviously this is something we can't control if it's true, and we're all headed to the same fate... but the thought is so scary(for me) that we'll(I'll) never be able to experience anything ever again or even exist ever again just is absolutely... mind consumingly frightening. Even though this world isn't perfect, I think it is better to exist than to not exist.

Anyhow...

And then there's the big bang theory and the theory of evolution. Ok, so there's a scientific theory as to how we all came to be and that everything was once nothing but for whatever reason something exploded OR started expanding for whatever reason... 13~ billion years ago. Out of nothingness, became existence? How could this be without an ultimate being that has always existed?

Now if you ask me, that makes no sense either. If everything were once nothingness, how could something just come to be? That does not make sense in the slightest. Nobody knows anything as far as that goes and this is all just theory as well. What does the big bang theory boil down to? Faith.

Is it possible that the big bang was a result of God? I don't see why not other than the whole "7 days" thing. Then again, if God is all powerful, why would it take 7 days? Why not just instantly have everything?

If you're still with me, I salute you. Hopefully I didn't confuse you too much, as I myself, am confused. What was the purpose of this? I don't know... just expressing what I'm thinking here at 2 and 3 in the morning.

My opinion is that if you get right down to it the really only logical explination is that there is God. But why am I not certain? I want to believe.

In summary, I would like to say that if not carried too far by people that are idiotic and extreme, regardless of its truth or not, certain religion is a good thing. Why? It's a good way to learn how to lead your life, if you care about being a good person at all and aren't capable of being one solely on your own.

Not only that, but again, regardless of its truth or not, truly believing can truly put your mind at ease if you're a good person and lead a good & moral life. You don't have to be scared of death like I am, and if you die... you're going to heaven if it's true. If not, you don't exist and you weren't scared in your final days, so no big deal. Sometimes I think it would be better to have been retarded. They're almost always happy. No worries for them. And I say that will all seriousness.