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Another Victory for the Luclin Design Team!
2002-03-25 00:49:41 - Animal Mother 

So we were in Ssra tonight with our sights set on killing this fool:



So with a mighty force of 25 Keyed FoH, we got this clusterfuck of a design error under control and killed this queer. After said queer was killed, Emperor spawns... now believe me, I WAS NOT expecting anything out of this encounter, I basically assumed he would be retardly designed, what I witnessed actually SURPASSED my expectations.

NOT only does he have this fantastic power which is the designer's way of telling us, "We are not very creative, we give up, you win, we suck, die please":



He also had this l33t power, only seen on one or two other uber mobs, the Bag of Supplies in Kael, those two gay invis mobs at zone in of ToV that people sit and hit for hours on end, and Lord Seru - only one of those mobs has been killed, and I'll tell you it wasn't the Bag of Supplies.



Now seriously, even I have my limits... this encounter actually managed to surpass the "Gayness Quotient" that I am able to withstand. There is only one man with a higher "Gayness Quotient" on this earth, and he doesn't play EQ, often.... so what to do?




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Sometimes You Just Gotta Stop and Smell the Roses
2002-03-21 22:55:53 - Main Tankin' Pussy Numero Uno 

Which is what I am demonstrating in this super picture. Notice my buttocks? Harder than diamond...

As you can see, we gave the Ring of Thule another go - results? Shit dead!

I must say, this ring is quickly turning out to be the l33test of all the rings, followed by the Ring of Crushbone and Ring of Mooto (Misty).

Since we nerfed ourselves by getting those CrAzY Focus Items toned down, we ended up having to hire a 300 man army of Rogues and Monks to get this far - either that, or our core of kick ass Wizards/Magicians/Enchanters/Necros did the impossible (as per the horde of know-nothing-level-54-gimps on Graffe) and proved themselves useful!



We spanked Dread first, then Fright, then were unfortunately overwhelmed when Terror was released - some loot was obtained, yea, its not the greatest loot, but it's only the first of many loots to come from this ring *shrug* - more importantly, we had a pretty kickass time.


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OH GLORIOUS PATCH DAY!
2002-03-19 23:44:26 - Animal Mother 

Aside from dumbing down the game another few levels, bringing the actual difficulty of killing any "Killable-Non-Intentionally-Cockblocked" Mob in the game down to the level of a flaming bus full of retarded hermaphrodites, we had this fantastic shit to look forward to:

Now mind you, I had to wade through quite a bit of shit to find this, but BY GOLLY IT WAS FUCKING THERE and you cannot say it wasn't!

"** Zones **

- Changed safe spot in Kedge Keep to actually be a safe spot
- The Beastlord trainer in Firiona Vie is now more friendly to Beastlords of all types
- Vyzh`dra the Cursed has been adjusted to help balance the risk versus reward associated with the encounter

Now we all know I don't give a shit about the change to the safe spot in Kedge Keep, and neither does FoH. While I DID masturbate after I read the line about the Beastlord trainer, the line that caught my eye and the eyes of other people across the servers was the last line: VYZH'DRA THE CURSED was adjusted to help balance out the Risk vs. Reward.

Now hold on there, some of you are going to tell me, "Animal Mother, you are full of shit - My guild went down to the Basement in Ssra today after the patch, we killed the Glyphed, we killed the Exhiled (Both in record time *Thanks MORE POWA VI!*) and then we came face to face with the Cursed and NOT A DAMN thing was changed." To you I say, WRONG. I have pictures to prove how he was "adjusted" to be more in line with his RvR - Peep this shit:



Now many of you don't know this but Verant Developers are into this Zen Buddhism shit or something and it shows in game. If a tree falls in a forest and nobody is there to hear it, does it make a sound? Same fucking philosophy here - Mezzdat didn't really die, nobody heard it, he lived and enjoyed a prosperous and kinky life as a homosexual midget herder. Case closed...

Now onto the Ring of Cazic-Thule... Not too much I can say here, we got pretty damn far, managing to spawn both the Avatar of Dread and Avatar of Fright without one fucking Rune dropping but that bastard in the far corner fucked us... Yea I'd say if we had another ~100 level 60s with Warcry, Bandage Wound (Maxed), and Turn Undead (Maxed), this ring would be NO PROBLEM. Did I mention the skill "TAUNT" doesn't work here? At all? Let me guess... "Working as intended?" Will the revamp of Najena disable beneficial spells cast upon other players? Only time will tell...



So ends another day in the expansion that should have been named "The Great Cockblock in the Sky."

This lemming is out! See you all next update - stay l33t...


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